Keep On Forgiving

a dangerous or unsportsmanlike play. For example, if a player tries to kick the ball out of the goalie's hands, that is dangerous. The goalie could be hurt, so the referee shows the player a yellow card as a warning not to do it again. If that player makes another dangerous play, the referee shows him the yellow card again, but then he would show him this card. (Hold up the red card.) Do you know what that means? The player is out of the game! That is pretty rough punishment, isn't it? You get one warning and then you are out! In baseball, the batter gets three strikes before he's out. In basketball, a player gets five or six fouls before he is out. The sport of soccer isn't very forgiving, is it?

Think about this for a moment: Why do you think different sports have different rules about second chances? In soccer, you might get ejected after just two warnings, but in other sports, you get more opportunities. What does this teach us about fairness and consequences? Now, let's think about real life. When your friend breaks a promise to you, or when someone at school says something mean about you, how many chances do you think they deserve? What about when you mess up - how many chances do you hope others will give you?

How many times do you think a person should be forgiven for doing something wrong? Once? Twice? Three times? If you were to ask Jesus how many times you should forgive someone, what do you think he would say? Well, we don't have to guess, because the Bible gives us the answer.

One day, Peter asked Jesus, "How many times should I forgive someone who sins against me? Should I forgive him seven times?" Now, here's something interesting - in Peter's culture, most religious teachers said you only had to forgive someone three times. So when Peter suggested seven times, he probably thought he was being incredibly generous - more than double what was expected! I imagine that Peter thought he was being pretty generous to forgive someone seven times. I don't know about you, but I think I agree with Peter. To forgive someone seven times does seem pretty generous. Guess what? Jesus didn't agree.

Jesus answered Peter, "Not seven times, but seventy times seven."

Wow! Seventy times seven! That's four hundred and ninety times. But here's the deeper question: Do you think Jesus really meant we should count to 490 and then stop forgiving? Or was He teaching us something bigger? I think that before I got to four hundred and ninety I would lose count. You know, I think that is probably exactly what Jesus was trying to get Peter to understand, and he wants us to understand it too. We shouldn't worry about keeping count of how many times we have forgiven someone -- we should just keep on forgiving, because that's what real love does.

But let's be honest - this is really hard sometimes. What about when someone keeps bullying you at school? What about when a friend keeps breaking their promises? What about when someone in your family keeps doing something that hurts your feelings? Jesus isn't asking us to be doormats or to let people keep hurting us. Sometimes forgiveness means we still need to set boundaries or ask for help from adults. But it does mean we don't hold grudges in our hearts or seek revenge.

Think about this: Isn't that what God does with us? He doesn't keep count of how many times he has forgiven us. The Bible says in Psalm 103:12 that "as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." God doesn't have a cosmic scoreboard where He's tracking our mistakes. He just keeps on forgiving when we truly ask for it.

Here's a challenge for you to think about: Why do you think forgiveness is sometimes harder than punishment? When someone hurts us, our natural reaction might be to hurt them back or to hold onto our anger. But Jesus calls us to something different - something that actually takes more strength and courage than revenge.

Some churches have a soccer league for boys and girls in grades K-6 called Upward Soccer. Most of the rules are the same as regular soccer, but there is one rule that is very different. In Upward soccer, there are no yellow cards and no red cards! I like that rule. It recognizes that we all make mistakes and we all do things that we should not do. But here's what I want you to remember: even though Upward soccer doesn't use cards, the players still need to learn good sportsmanship and follow the rules. Forgiveness doesn't mean there are no consequences - it means we don't let anger and revenge control our hearts.

So here's your challenge this week: Think of someone who has hurt you or made you angry. Maybe it's a sibling who broke something of yours, or a friend who said something mean, or a classmate who excluded you. Instead of keeping score of what they did wrong, try to forgive them - not because they deserve it, but because God has forgiven you for so much more. And remember, forgiveness is a choice we make, not a feeling we wait for.

Dear Father, we are thankful that you love us and forgive us without keeping count. We know that forgiveness isn't always easy, but we want to follow Jesus's example. Help us to love and forgive others as you have forgiven us, even when it's hard, even when they don't deserve it, and even when we don't feel like it. Give us the wisdom to know when we need to set boundaries while still keeping forgiveness in our hearts. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.

Note: The game that we call soccer in the U.S. is known as football in some countries. Please make this change if appropriate.